Sometimes I recognize the feeling of my face… from the inside looking out… making specific emotional expressions… when I laugh at certain jokes… or discover some awe inspiring vision of wonder… I can hear the tone in my voice or feel it in my face, making the same facial expression as my mother or father…. not seeing it in a mirror, but FEELING it…

Distinct moments and circumstances give birth to different reactions (obviously), but I have noticed there are consistent, specific occasions that produce “my mother’s face” or “my father’s face.” It is a strange, eerie sensation, but I know I will someday welcome them and even cling to them, maybe even TRY to feel them after my parents are gone.

For now, they just remind me that I am carrying a treasure inside of me. Someday, I think they will be close, personal friends of mine, waiting to join me in moments of happiness and despair and joy and sorrow… they’ll be unexpectedly triggered by unrelated events, sneak up on me like a tricky jokester, laid on me to produce those facial expressions that were somehow handed down to me, perhaps from generations and generations…

No one will know they’re getting a special glimpse of my mother, or my father… but I will know… and I’ll probably smile even more… which will probably be my mother’s or father’s smile…